knomat?

I got caught checking in on an ex-girlfriend in probably the most awkward way possible. All thanks to the modern wonder of social networking. I decided to take a look at said ex-girlfriend’s Facebook profile. You’ve all done it. Don’t lie. When I arrive at the profile page, I notice that my ex (who we’ll call Jane for the sake of explanation) has uploaded some new pictures to her Facebook page. As I’m navigating my mouse pointer to click on “View more pictures of Jane,” I was a bit too quick on the trigger and mistakenly clicked on the link immediately below. This link, my friends, was called “Hug Jane.”

Now, while some of you are laughing because you understand why this is funny, let me explain to the rest of you not so familiar with Facebook. Facebook has this dumb feature built in called “Poke,” with which you can “poke” someone. A “poke” is merely a brief message that shows up in the pokee’s inbox that says, “Someone has poked you.” Some genius decided to come up with a more powerful poking application called, appropriately, “SuperPoke.” With SuperPoke you can do things like drop-kick, bitch slap, throw a sheep at, and, in this case, hug people. All this simply shows up on one’s Facebook profile page as “So and so has [x] so and so.” Where x = things like the ones I’ve just described. A recent example from my experience: “Matt has bitch slapped Dave using Super Poke.”

So, back to my story. I think you’ll start to understand why what I did can prove to be problematic. What I had just done, essentially, was hugged an ex who I hadn’t seen or talked to in a good year or so. The message to her would have come through something like this. “Matt has hugged you.” The message also would have appeared on her profile as “Matt has hugged Jane.”

I hope this will serve as a warning to you all, because I know that you’re checking up on your ex-girlfriends/boyfriends. Proceed (stalk) with caution.